Thursday, December 10, 2009

Exploring Intimacy interview

I was interviewed for this website a while back and they've finally published it on the site. :)

http://exploringintimacy.wordpress.com/2009/12/08/kink-interview-jacks-love-of-his-wifes-sneakers-and-men-but-thats-another-story/

Kink Interview: Jack’s Love of His Wife’s Sneakers (and men, but that’s another story)
Posted on December 8, 2009 by ExploringIntimacy

This one's just for you, Jack!

It seems that foot and shoe lovers around here are ready to take off! Jack is here to tell us about how he discovered his love of women’s comfy shoes, something he now explores with his wife of many years. Jack is certainly proof that marriage and kink can go together! Keep reading to learn about it.

You can call me Jack. I’m 32, married over 10 years. My first many sexual experiences were with other boys from age 7. I consider myself someplace between bisexual and heteroflexible. I am in the closet with friends and family on these desires and since highschool have only had one sexual encounter with another man.

I am really into women’s shoes. I thought for years that it was very uncommon and while, as the more “mainstream” fetishes go it still is, I am finding more and more people into it. I recently learned it has a name… retifism. The probably more unique nature to my kink here is that while I love seeing women in shoes, especially tennis shoes, it is the shoes themselves that turn me on. I love playing with a woman’s pair of shoes, either cumming on them, having sex with them, or kissing them… I also get completely aroused just by seeing a pair sitting there. I told my wife once and even showed her some pictures I had taken playing with her shoes in one of those we-were-both-over-the-top-horny-and-talking-too-much moments… she would tease me for weeks just walking through the shoe department at the store… and yes, I was hard as a rock every time.

My searches for like-minded fetishists on the internet have evidenced to me that it is probably more common among gay men, with men’s shoes. I have tried playing with my own… but honestly, they did nothing for me.

How did I get interested? Wow… I guess it started as a more typical foot fetish. I was at a retreat with my church youth group in middle school and one of the very hot high school girls was sitting on the floor in her socks and that was the first time I was turned on by a woman sexually. There was a neighbor boy who lived across the street and I would sniff his shoes while jacking off when he stayed the night… (I had a crush on him.) I often tied them to my face with the shoe strings. I don’t recall ever cumming in them though and honestly aside from that, I have had no other interest in men’s shoes at all. In 9th grade, when I started dating the girl who would later become my wife, I would lick her feet and suck her toes. We split up after I graduated and I found myself doing the same with my then fiance, Shannon. She had these Chucks that I just thought were sexy. My wife (then gf) had a pair of plain white canvas shoes that I liked too. So after a few years of marriage, I eventually started playing with my wife’s shoes and then her sisters and co-workers.

I have brought this up more recently again with my wife. She gave me a handjob with one of her dirty socks. (I have a video!) and I have also told her I would like her to use one of her shoes. Aside from that, having sex with my wife while she has her shoes on has been one way I have incorporated it, as well as fucking the shoes themselves or cumming on them and licking them clean.

I have needed to make sure I don’t leave stains on the shoes, especially those belonging to my sister in law or others who do not know I play with them. Of course, I’ve had to do the same with my wife’s because for a long time, she had no idea I played with them and then after I was “advised” not to ruin them. lol

Of course, being caught with the shoes when the borrowee is looking for them is always a concern as well.

I think the submissive nature to getting off on a woman’s dirty shoes is a large part of the lure for me. I do like how they smell, especially tennis shoes… new or worn. I feel in some odd way connected to the woman who owns them when I’ve had sex with her shoes.

When I told my wife, at first she was like… really? why? … I was of course embarrassed at having opened up that way and the humiliation was very exciting. It was the first time I had experienced that tied to sexuality. She was pretty quick to go from shocked curiosity to playful teasing. On the internet, it seems to be mostly welcomed, but I will occasionally get the comment of “freak” on the pictures I post. I just delete them.

I am looking forward to meeting with someone to play with shoes when I find someone I am comfortable with. So far, I have looked into different relevant forums but mostly those interested have contacted me after seeing my pics and videos posted to NewbieNudes or Xtube.

Resources: Google search “retifism” or “altocalciphilia” . You can check out the forum at WetHighHeels, HotShoeShots or the Shoe Fetish blog.

If you would like to contact Jack, feel free to drop him an email or visit his blog. I would note that his 11/24/09 entry is on one of my favorite topics!

Jack, thanks so much for sharing your stories with us. It isn’t often that we get interviews about long term, committed couples exploring kink together and it’s good to hear about that side, too! I hope you’ll drop us a line as you continue to explore, to tell us how it’s going.

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